About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
This is my gift to your gina
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
