haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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