Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
