I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Randomize
