she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize