is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
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