Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Duck Duck Cougar?
Say something about gay babies.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Randomize
