I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Randomize
