She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
