I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
then he tried to convert me to islam
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
