I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
that is very illegal...i love you.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
