Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Semen is not good for contacts.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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