This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
