he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Randomize
