my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
