I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize