im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Randomize
