Who did Billy Mays play for?
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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