Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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