i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
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