i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Randomize
