Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Randomize