is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
