we made out on top of his cat.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Pants are for mortals
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize