Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Welp...herpes.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
