Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize