hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
