I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Randomize
