Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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