You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize
