I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
