Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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