oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I am full of burrito and curiosity
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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