my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
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