Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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