thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Randomize
