Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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