Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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