She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
