There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
