Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
