Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
And then my night got REAL pukey
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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