I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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