I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
where are my eyebrows?
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
