I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize
