But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Randomize
