dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
