kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
