Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
whose ass print is on the piano?
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Randomize
