Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize