I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
