he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
